Are you thinking about throwing in the towel and resigning from a career you love due to chronic illness?

Deciding to leave a job due to chronic illness is not an easy decision to make.

One day you wake up and seem fine, do a couple of tasks like run errands, house chores, take short walks outside, and then you’re out for a couple of days in bed.

Increased chronic pain can interfere with being able to work and contemplate being unemployed.

To make matters worse, you’re fending off gossip, office bullies, people who think they know more about what’s going on in your life than you do, and an unsupportive boss who enjoys adding to your chronic stress by allowing co-workers to treat you horribly.

Workplace discrimination due to a medical condition doesn’t have to be tolerated.

Anticipated Stigma And Bullying

I am putting out a BOLO (be on the lookout) on the serial predator, pervert, unsupportive boss, and co-worker masquerading as an office bully that promotes and participates in acts of demeaning and illicit behavior towards individuals living and working with a chronic illness.

Anticipated stigma doesn’t help alleviate chronic illness and improve health and well being. Bullying creates social isolation.

In case you, your boss, or co-workers aren’t aware, disability discrimination and workplace harassment are unlawful.

You don’t have to tolerate workplace harassment. You can file a discrimination complaint.

Choose the latter option after you have exhausted all mediation attempts with your boss, labor relations representative, and human resources office.

Regardless of the path you choose, healing starts with looking the invisible illness in the eye.

Let me tell you a story about the sickening and demeaning experiences employees go through every day who work with a chronic illness and experience disability discrimination in the form of office bullying.

Injection of sarcasm will happen every couple of paragraphs to lighten up the mood and reveal teachable moments so this kind of treatment across organizations cease to exist.

My Medical Mystery And Root Cause

More than 25 million U.S. adults have some level of daily pain, and 10.5 million have considerable pain every day.

Over time, chronic pain can affect your emotional and mental state. Not too many people know chronic pain sufferers are at an increased risk of suicide.

In the long-run, more harm will be done if you stay the course, ignore your body, and not prioritize your health.

After being pricked and poked for over five years and tested for Lyme disease, MS, rheumatoid arthritis, I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia, chronic pain syndrome, low back pain, headaches, and fatigue.

My symptoms slowly and quietly began nine years earlier, beginning with fatigue.

I made an appointment to see a doctor. My labs came back normal. I was diagnosed with depression.

Medical Misogyny

I knew I wasn’t depressed but had no idea of what was going on with my body or how to explain my symptoms except my body was exhausted and sleep-deprived.

Too often women experience ‘medical misogyny’ when trying to make people believe her pain.

Some doctors think women, especially women of color are exaggerating, leading to being misdiagnosed, ignoring severe medical conditions, and not getting proper medical treatment. 

Spooked from the experience at my doctor’s office, I convinced myself the symptoms I was experiencing were all “in my head”.

Soon after, I would experience multiple physical injuries back to back.

Even with rounds of physical therapy, I didn’t feel 100%.

Later on, I started to become anxious and moody, feeling like someone was poking me with a pin cushion all day and all night.

Before the chronic conditions, I was an extrovert, a social butterfly who loved being around people and going out.

As the pain, chronic migraines, and episodes of vertigo increased, I started thinking about quitting my job.

Little did I know, my body was in a state of crisis.

My chronic illness turned me into an introvert with an extreme case of social anxiety.

I stopped going outside, hanging out with friends and people from work, spending every weekend in bed because I was too exhausted and in pain.

I gave myself a hard time calling myself ‘lazy’ and would work out harder than before to prove there was nothing wrong with me.

Pushing myself physically didn’t help the situation at all.

I was running out of nine lives.

Deciding When To Leave A Job

Telling your boss about your condition or ailment can be scary. You don’t know what his/her reaction will be.

One of two scenarios can occur.

Your boss may know a colleague or a family member facing similar challenges with an invisible illness and promote a change in hours and duties.

Or you’re punished for having a chronic illness with more projects while co-workers get a free pass.

All because you don’t look visibly sick.

After seven years of tests, labs, x-rays, and MRIs, I received another diagnosis.

I was finally able to put a name to my condition, fibromyalgia, and chronic pain syndrome.

While I was happy to know what was wrong with me, with the doctor reassuring me I couldn’t die from the chronic illness (not true for all, remember the stats I provided earlier on chronic pain sufferers?), I needed to learn more about this condition and what it meant for my quality of life.

After my symptoms continued to worsen, the stressful environment and constant office bullying led me to verbally inform my boss years in advance that I would be leaving my position.

I remember drafting and turning in my letter of resignation like it was yesterday.

That week, pain and anxiety levels were higher than usual, and nothing was going right in my personal and professional life.

Prior to submitting my letter of resignation, there was an assumption that I was getting special treatment because I was leaving work early.

Who knew, going to physical therapy, receiving acupuncture treatments, taking care of a sick parent all while trying to figure out what the heck was wrong health-wise was a crime.

Talk about stressful.

I scheduled an office call to explain my medical condition to my boss and the reasons why it was the best decision for me to pass the torch onto someone else.

Visualization Techniques For Success And Healing

Before meeting with your supervisor, practice visualizing the conversation to anticipate reactions, behavioral patterns, and mood.

Playing the devil’s advocate ahead of time in your head prior to conversing with your supervisor will make you ten moves ahead to respond appropriately in the event the conversation goes well or sour.

Visualization techniques can be applied to accomplish goals and manage pain.

The response I received was, “if you leave your position, you will disappoint me.”

Before making any sudden decisions you may regret, always sleep on it.

Not the type to wilt like a wildflower and back down, the next day, I emailed my months notice resignation letter to the Human Resources department.

Nobody puts Baby in the corner or threatens her.

What Am I Sick With?

I would spend late nights fighting off insomnia reading articles online that seemed to have been copied over and pasted onto multiple websites of no value in answering my question.

What was wrong with me, and what the heck was fibromyalgia? What impact would the invisible illness have on my life and career long-term?

I knew I wasn’t the only one in this world living with fibromyalgia.

Come to find out, I wasn’t the only one. I came across some useful information about alternative treatments. Thanks, Pinterest pinners!

Acupuncture treatments were effective in pain management.

At my first appointment, my acupuncturist revealed she had fibromyalgia for over 20 years.

A glimmer of hope began to emerge in getting some answers.

Requesting A Reasonable Work Accommodation

Quitting your job should be the last resort, not the first.

There isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution for chronic pain sufferers as an invisible illness affects each person differently.

Lack of mobility adds to the heightened levels of physical, mental, and emotional stress.

A significant flare-up can make it impossible to keep up with the mental and physical demands of a job.

Requesting reasonable work accommodations (work from home, flexible time, and change in work hours) is a good place to start.

Brain Fog Symptoms

I used to be good at memorization. Slowly I lost my words unable to speak.

Initially, I thought I suffered a stroke. What I was experiencing was brain fog.

I remember staying after hours to go over my projects and administrative paperwork to fix the typos and errors I made earlier in the day.

Working over 40 hours became commonplace to fix my mistakes.

The brain fog got so bad that I couldn’t hide it anymore. When making sales and marketing presentations to clients, I couldn’t speak without looking at my notecards.

Workplace Harassment

Let’s go deeper into workplace harassment, chronic illness, and office bullies.

Navigating the workplace with an invisible illness isn’t easy.

Daily harassment can impair decision making, lead to throwing in the towel prematurely, and walk out on a career or job you love.

You know when you need to change careers when your peers, instead of being concerned, offering support and encouragement, begin talking to you like you’re incredibly stupid.

Workplace Harassment Examples

Intimidation tactics like spreading false narratives, cornering you, following or waiting for you in the parking lot before or after work are a few examples of workplace harassment.

When no one is around, a colleague may approach you and say, “there is nothing wrong with you.”

These workplace harassment examples are only the beginning of psychiatric stigma and prejudice.

If your condition interferes with your work performance, don’t hesitate to communicate challenges to your boss.

There is no obligation to share your medical condition with your co-workers.

If you do, be selective of who you tell and ensure the individual(s) receiving this information respect your privacy and don’t go on an office gossip rampage.

We are talking about your health, not a game of checkers.

Family And Medical Leave Act

The Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) and Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) are laws designed to protect employees from being fired due to disability and medical reasons.

Under the Family and Medical Leave Act, eligible employees who work for a covered employer can take up to 12 weeks of unpaid, job-protected leave in 12 months to tend to a severe health condition, take care of a family member, the birth or adoption of a child.

FMLA can offer peace of mind to take time off for regular doctor’s visits, treatments, and time to heal without worrying about the financial burden of unpaid leave.

Under ADA, companies are required to provide reasonable work accommodations for their employees.

If you’re a chronic pain sufferer, you know the challenges of experiencing a flare-up and trying to concentrate.

Chemo treatments and newly prescribed medication to manage your symptoms can make you feel more fatigued.

Work Schedule Change Request

An office meeting with your boss, union rep or human resources representative allows the opportunity to explore work accommodation options.

Working from home is an example of reasonable work accommodation.

I made a change to my work schedule, working from home one day a week.

It worked for a while until I started missing my acupuncture appointments from working too late at home.

My acupuncturist told me, “if you want the treatments to work, you have to show up to your appointments.”

After looking at flexible schedule options, I changed my work schedule.

The day off allowed me to go to doctor’s appointments and be a caregiver to a sick parent.

Leave Donation Or Leave Sharing Program

Some companies and agencies offer a leave donation or leave sharing program to employees. The program can be useful if you experience complications with your chronic illness and have exhausted all your leave.

The program allows donations of paid time off, vacation, or sick leave between employees with personal or family medical emergencies.

Your Human Resources department can confirm the existence or non-existence of a leave program and options available.

Before I became ill, I rarely called in sick, let alone used my sick days. Luckily I accumulated a lot of sick leave and didn’t have to resort to using a leave program.

Individuals experiencing complications from a pregnancy, surgery, or need to care for a sick parent can benefit from the program.

Unfortunately, those who abuse time-off rules and honest people who follow create perceptions of scamming the system.

Risk of being bullied by individuals who feel they’re not getting their fair share increases.

As I mentioned earlier, be selective about who else knows about your chronic illness.

Ensure the individual(s) receiving this information, respect your privacy.

Even though FMLA and ADA offer employees protection, it doesn’t prevent your boss from letting you go due to conditions not related to disability, not meeting work performance standards, health, and safety concerns in the workplace.

Part 2 continues with examples of workplace harassment, tell-tale signs when it’s time to leave your job and work with an organization that wants your skills and knowledge on their team.